Tuesday, December 13, 2016 | 8:02 PM | 0 Alien
Characters: Kyungsoo, April (OC), Oh Sehun
Genre: slight angst
Words: 4534 words
Summary: Kyungsoo met a blind lady at a cafe and he thought he was in love with her.
(Italic = flashback)
Kyungsoo inhaled the cold air sharply, fingers frozen on the piano keys. His mind was wandering through the snowy roads of his relationship with April, the lady he met on the first day of Spring back in 2014. He exhaled, looking at his surrounding. A pair of couple cuddled with hot cups of cappucino in their hands, looking at each other with love. A man in his mid 40s who talked to the phone, immediately smiling as his two eyes landed on the woman clad in Chanel 2016 jacket winter collection. They shared a quick peck on the cheek before the woman took a seat opposite of him. The corner of his lips curved upwards for such a long time. Kyungsoo sighed. Everything had changed. Everything. Except his feelings towards April.
-
The cafe was known to be a place for brokenhearted people for a reason. It served hot coffee to heal the hearts of the customers, a piece of cake to fade away the scars and free sweets to forget the pain. Kyungsoo was not heartbroken when he first got there - he was never, in the first place. It was an impulse plus curiosity that made him stepped into the cozy cafe on the first day of Spring, when he wanted to take a break from his never-ending work - not that he didn’t like to save lives - but he needed some space. He was a cardiologist - the best in town - at Myungho University Hospital.
The moment he entered Heart Cafe for the first time, his mind told him to run , far far away from the small building which was located at the south-end of Seoul. The bad instinct was consuming him but he shrugged it off, his feet in the brand new black Polo shoes brought him to an empty table at the corner. When he settled in, his eyes couldn’t stop examining his surrounding. Everyone looked so pathetic in his eyes - messy hair, red eyes and frowns - to the point that he asked himself what have gotten into people nowadays. His thought was immediately disturbed by the waiter with two ponytails who plastered a small smile on her smudged face. He was horrified. She handed him the menu and left, telling him to push the small ring bell on the table once he was ready to order. He nodded. He scanned the menu with his big eyes, but then sweet melody of the piano approached him with pure sweetness and softness. He looked up and his eyes landed exactly on the lady with short wavy hair who was playing the piano. April. Her lean fingers ran swiftly on the piano tiles, eyes closed the whole time, as if she was in her own world. He knew the piece though. It was Reminiscent by his favorite Korean pianist, Yiruma. He had records of Yiruma at home. Lots of them. On the white rack by the window of his study room.
-
Kyungsoo looked at his surrounding again. The other customers were still on cloud nine, some of them were in seventh heaven, while Kyungsoo was stuck in the past, in which it seemed like hell.
-
Kyungsoo ordered a bowl of cheesy aglio oglio from the Chef’s Recommendation section and a big cup of hot mocha latte. April was still playing the piano, but this time, she played River Flows In You. Her eyes were still tightly closed. Kyungsoo adored her talent - for being able to play without seeing the notes - that he had the urge to approach her. It was just a thought, an impossible one, because Kyungsoo knew very well how awkward the situation would be if he approached her first. He wasn’t born to socialize with people, he loved to say. He just shrugged. He then focused on his food, the pasta was served in a shiny plate. Once the pasta was almost finished, Kyungsoo noticed a red incomplete heart shape on the plate, with some words in the heart. He finished his lunch and the complete shape appeared - a red heart with ‘Love is just for the hopeless’ words in it - and he scoffed. No wonder people called it a place for brokenhearted people.
Kyungsoo somehow waited for April to stop playing as he took a sip on his drink. She played Yiruma’s pieces, especially Indigo, over and over again. Indigo was his favorite - if he had to choose - and the fact that the young lady in her early 20s kept playing Indigo made him think that it could be her favorite too. He didn’t want to leave until she stopped but he was paged by Dr. Oh Sehun. Wanted it or not, he had to leave. He didn’t have a choice anyway - he vowed to save lives when he first stepped into the hospital - so he paid for his meal and left, with hopes that April would be there on the next day.
-
The cafe was absurdly cold when it was supposed to be warm and cozy, a place to feel as if you were at home. Kyungsoo pressed a key on the piano but that sounded so wrong. No, the piano was at its finest condition, but Kyungsoo was not. His heart was not fine. Not that he could mend it on his own, even though he was a cardiologist. He made money from people with heart diseases, he cured people’s heart and he saved thousands of people up to the day, but the wound in his heart was invisible. He couldn’t see the scar through CT scan. Even if he did the eighty-thousand-worth scan, he could never see the emptiness of his heart. The pain was invisible and inevitable, controlled by his mind.
-
Kyungsoo could not find April on the next day. And on the next next day. And on the next next next day. He had been paying the cafe a visit for two consecutive weeks but she was nowhere to be found. He was starting to give up - he didn’t even know why looked for her in the first place - but somehow, his heart screamed to never stop. He remembered his grandfather told him that following your instinct could bring happiness or sadness or both. And so he followed his heart, gambling with fate, and kept visiting the cafe.
Exactly on his 20th visit to the cafe, he proved his instinct right. There, on the piano stool, sat the lady whose fingers were dancing gracefully on the piano. Every key she pressed sounded so peaceful, as if she was radiating love to everyone in the cafe. Kyungsoo’s feet brought him towards the piano and he stood beside her. He noticed that she still closed her eyes tightly and he couldn’t help but to be in awe with her. The piece she was playing was not Yiruma’s, it was Ave Maria. April somehow sensed his presence as she stopped once the piece came to an end.
“Yes?”
Her voice was thin, quite nasal, unique even but calming. It was just as how Kyungsoo imagined her voice would sound. The corner of her lips curved a bit, standing out her high cheek bones. Kyungsoo cleared his voice.
“Where did you go?”
Kyungsoo sounded angry, his tone was higher than usual, which surprised him. The lady’s small smile disappeared in a matter of seconds as his smooth rich voice reminded her of someone. Someone close to her. Someone she missed so much.
Eyes still closed, she turned to him and furrowed her brown eyebrows.
“Pardon me, sir?”
Kyungsoo started to think that something was wrong with her eyes. He took a deep breath, trying so hard to sound normal.
“I waited for you to show up here for two weeks.” There. The truth. She was quite taken aback. She turned away, eyes never opened.
“Why? I don’t even know you.”
“I wanted to approach you.”
The lady’s full lips formed a thin line, chest heaved. Kyungsoo’s voice was a tone lower than her ex-fiance’s, but both of them had the same richness in their voice. The sweet voice that could weaken every girl’s knees. The voice that would be the perfect voice to sing lullaby. The kind of voice that rang forever in her mind.
Straightening her spine, she let out a heavy sigh. “Well,” she said, “You already approached me.” Kyungsoo smiled sheepishly, slightly biting his bottom lip. Why did the nice air of spring suddenly felt hot, he asked himself. He could feel his cheeks getting red.
“Right,” he paused, calculating the possibilities of unawkward moments if he praised her talent. Ah, screw the calculation, he then thought.
“You are cool, okay? Very cool. Honestly. I’m a cardiologist but my pride is high but really, you are cool. Like, seriously, how can a person play the piano with both if your eyes closed? I thought people like that only exist in movies. Oh God. I sounded very excited, didn’t I?”
April let out a giggle at how excited Kyungsoo sounded. It was as if euphoria took over him. She found it funny - the situation - and for the first time in five months, she broke into a laughter. The real one. After five months of hovering under the dark clouds, she finally found the bright sky again. Finally. She learned to laugh again. She remembered the felicity now. How blissful it felt back then.
“But I’m not cool. The situation forces me to play in this state, you know,” the lady said with a smile on her flawless face. Kyungsoo sensed something but he shrugged the thought off. He insisted that it was still amazing nevertheless. She couldn’t deny more.
“I have to go,” Kyungsoo excused himself when he was paged by a nurse and he extended his palm to shake her hand. She didn’t respond. Her hands were still in touch with the piano keys. He waited for another few seconds. The lady stilled. Kyungsoo pulled away, quite embarrassed.
“Will you be here tomorrow?” Kyungsoo was surprised by his own question. It was supposed to be a thought. It should stay lingering in his mind. To his luck, April smiled, slightly nodding.
“You can find me here tomorrow.”
-
Kyungsoo was tired of waiting. His patience grew weary. He had lost count of how many times he was been waiting for her at the same time, at the same place, at exactly the same spot. She just never showed up. Not once. For the past few months. Maybe I should stop, he once thought. But he heard her in the back of his head, on their last meeting, “You will find me here someday. Always look for me. Please.” He remembered the sorrow in her voice, how shaky the voice was. He remembered everything clearly. But in order to save people’s lives by fixing their heart, he must save his own heart first. Only he couldn’t.
-
Kyungsoo rescheduled his surgeries - all of them - to the night and early morning, leaving his evening free to meet April at the cafe. Sehun was quite worried when he saw Kyungsoo postponing his upcoming Humpty Dumpty surgery, thinking that Kyungsoo might be sick. The older guy only shrugged, didn’t even explain his excuses even though he knew Sehun had been waiting to scrub in with him for the once-in-a-blue-moon chance. Sehun could wait, he thought. The patient could wait. The heart would still be functioning in a few more hours. But that lady - April - she couldn’t wait. Correction. It was him. It was Kyungsoo who couldn’t wait. He had been spending all day thinking of her. It was not love, he believed, but it was something more. Something consuming that eventually he became addicted. He was driven to meet her. For the first time in forever, he felt as if fate had been planning to bring them together. It was as if fate had better plans for his future rather than spending his old days saving lives alone and come home to a big bungalow with no one but Sehun being his housemate.
Right at 4.00 in the evening, Kyungsoo had finally finished an emergency surgery on the old woman who was involved in a massive accident with a truck. He had spared her life successfully without any complications or hardships. But this reminded him of his surgery five months ago, on a patient named Boo Seungkwan, who was stucked in his car when the tunnel that acted as an alternative road from Busan to Seoul had crashed due to the earthquake. Since Seungkwan’s body was attached to the car, Kyungsoo had to go to the scene to save his life. His heart was almost in the same condition as the old woman’s. Only Seungkwan was losing so much blood that the blood bank the medical team brought wasn’t enough. It wasn’t enough. Kyungsoo’s four hours of fixing his heart came to a waste of time. He was gone. Just because of the stupid reason - insufficiency of O negative blood.
Kyungsoo’s walk down the memory lane was interrupted by Dr. Hong Joshua, asking him for a medical consult for a patient named Kim Jongin. Kyungsoo let out a sigh as he stole a glance on his Rolex. Damn. He was late. Not practically late though since he didn’t actually promise to see April, but he just needed to see her fast.
“Can you wait until tonight?”
“I’m afraid the patient is having a surgery tonight, Kyungsoo.” Kyungsoo inhaled sharply. He was literally torn apart. But then, Sehun appeared out of nowhere before his eyes and he immediately said, “Ask Dr. Oh to check the patient. I taught him everything I know about heart.” Thank God, Kyungsoo mentally shouted in happiness. Dr. Hong turned to Sehun as Kyungsoo quickly clicked his heels and exited the hospital. He was very eager to meet April.
The moment he entered the cafe, his ears were cleansed by the softness of the melody that was played by April. She played Kiss The Rain by Yiruma this time. Kyungsoo settled in a table at the corner of the cafe, next to the transparent glass, the table he sat when he first came to the cozy place. He ordered seafood lasagna and his favorite drink, hot mocha latte as he enjoyed April’s show. He must have been so immersed into the melody that he didn’t even turn around to examine other people. He realized it. He was in a world full of unicorns and rainbows and he was feeling blissful.
Since his food was not ready by the time April finished Yiruma’s piece, Kyungsoo walked towards her. He was not nervous. Not anymore. April could hear his footsteps - the clicking of his Polo shoes on the marble floor - and she turned around with a smile. She knew it was Kyungsoo. The guy clad in short-sleeved Calvin Klein shirt replied her smile with a big grin, which of course, she couldn’t see.
“Can you take a break and have coffee with me?” Kyungsoo asked, hoping her to say yes. To his luck, she nodded.
“But I can’t-” she paused. She took a deep breath.
“Can you help me?”
Kyungsoo understood her. He immediately took her soft hand as she stood up. Slowly, he led her to his table, where his food and drink were already served. He pushed the small bell on the table and the waitress in smudged make up came to them with a pen in her left hand, ready to take another order.
“One cold cappucino, please.”
With April sitting in front of him, Kyungsoo felt awkward to eat his food but he ate anyway. It would a waste to not eat. Plus, he had a rough night ahead waiting for him. A night full of surgeries.
“So, what is your name?” April asked to break the silence between them. Kyungsoo smiled sheepishly, realizing that he didn’t even introduced himself when he first approached her. How rude.
“Do Kyungsoo. I am a cardiologist.”
“Jeon April. 26 years old. I was a pianist.” Kyungsoo was surprised at how she used past tense. She was still a pianist, wasn’t she?
“Aren’t you still playing the piano? What’s up with the past tense?”
The lady before him chuckled.
“There are differences between playing the piano and being a pianist. Playing the piano is just- playing the piano. You remember the keys and you play within your knowledge. While being a pianist is something greater. Something big. You express yourself through the piano. You allow people to explore your world.” She stopped. Taking a deep breath, she continued, “You play to heal people.” Kyungsoo nodded, munching on the cheesy lasagna.
“But I don’t quite get it. The part why you’re not a pianist anymore.”
Just then, the waitress served her the cold cappucino. Instead of putting it on the table, she grabbed April’s hand and handed her the cup. April mouthed a thanks to her and she left. She took a sip on her drink, clearing her dry throat.
“I don’t play to heal people anymore.”
“But why?”
April chuckled again. “You’re a curious person.” Kyungsoo blamed his job for that. Really. As a cardiologist, he needed to ask a lot of questions in order to give his patients the best treatment. Asking questions was a part of learning besides observing, his mentor used to say back then when he was just an intern.
“I play just because I can. That’s the only thing I can do without anyone’s help. The only thing,” she said softly. It was almost a whisper. Kyungsoo noticed the sadness in her voice but he chose to ignore it.
“Are you sure that you’re safe with me?” Kyungsoo tried to lighten up her mood. She furrowed her eyebrows before taking another sip on her favorite drink. “Why?”
“I could be a kidnapper, you know. I could bring you anywhere and ask for ransom from your parents.” She chuckled.
“You won’t. If you were to kidnap me, believe me, you won’t be able to even exit this cafe.” Kyungsoo didn’t get it. “Can you see the two men at the nearest table to the piano? Those are my men.”
Kyungsoo turned to the direction she said and he saw the two men. Both were muscular and big in size. Much bigger than him. They also seemed very tall that Kyungsoo mentally labelled them as giants. The two men suddenly had eye contacts with Kyungsoo and he quickly looked away, frightened.
“That is scary,” he made a remark. April ran her fingers along her short hair and said, “It’s fine. They won’t hurt you.” She paused for awhile.
“As long as you don’t hurt me.”
-
Kyungsoo found himself getting hurt worse every single day. The endless waiting killed him. Almost. He was barely alive. He could barely breathe. The cold surrounding didn’t do him any justice. The pain didn’t go numb. The wound was still bleeding. And this time, he couldn’t do anything to stop the bleeding but to stare and wait. Wait till the very end.
-
“Kyungsoo,” April’s thin voice echoed in the four walls of the cafe. The guy looked up from the book he was reading and plastered a smile on his face. April’s face was serious. Her eyebrows slightly twitched as she asked, “Have you ever gave up in life at any circumstances?”
Kyungsoo blinked. He put a bookmark on the page he was reading and closed the thick medical book he bought from his senior.
“I have.” Kyungsoo’s full lips pursued into a thin line. “You see, medicine is not actually my passion. I was forced to study medicine because of my parents. You know, typical asian parents who want their children to be a doctor or lawyer. Hahaha,” the laugh was fake. April sensed it.
“I have to give up singing since I can’t focus on two things at the same time. I have to choose. And I apparently choose my parents.”
“Do you regret your decision?”
Kyungsoo’s eyes softened. “No.” He took a large gasp of air and continued, “I am a cardiologist now. The respected one. I’m fine with it.”
April nodded, fingers playing with the hem of her shirt.
“Are you giving up?” Kyungsoo asked the lady before him. She shook his head. “Almost. I was drowning. The accident-” April paused. She closed her mouth for a few seconds. “Anyway, I have you now, haven’t I?”
Kyungsoo could feel his face getting red. Oh God. He was mentally thankful that April couldn’t see him blushing.
“Kyungsoo,” she called him.
“Can you sing for me?”
-
The song that was playing in the cafe was April’s favorite - Stay by Miley Cyrus. It was the first song Kyungsoo sang to her. And apparently, it was also the last song he sang on their last meeting. Kyungsoo clutched his jeans slightly, closing his eyes as he remembered how she praised his singing.
“I could listen to you singing every single second in my life and never get enough of it.”
Kyungsoo could feel tears welling in his eyes. He missed her. He missed April so much.
-
Kyungsoo was curious of the accident that happened eight months ago. He wanted to know more about the accident that took away April’s eyes. He needed to know something about it. And so he asked her, very carefully.
April only answered with a smile at first. She took a few sips on her cold cappucino and continued smiling. As if the accident didn’t affect her one bit. Kyungsoo was nervous, his heart beating fast. After what it seemed like five minutes, April started to speak.
“We went on a vacation in Busan. On our way home to Seoul, I insisted that we used the alternative road to Seoul. You know, the tunnel. He didn’t want to because he was just paranoid of tunnels. He once trapped in a tunnel when he was 10 so yeah, the guy was traumatized.” April took another sip on the drink in her hand. “There was an earthquake all of the sudden. The tunnel fell down and glasses from the car got into my eyes.” She paused, gulping.
Kyungsoo watched her closely, not even blinking the whole time.
“The doctor couldn’t save my eyes. It was hard to accept at first but sure I could survive. I knew I could. But-” April paused again. She drank her cappucino until the cup was empty.
"The doctor couldn’t save him also. My person- My guy- My fiance couldn’t be saved by the doctor. And yet people said that he was the best cardiologist in the country.” She scoffed, her tone was getting higher. Her hands trembled from the anger she was feeling. Or was it sadness? Kyungsoo could not tell. But he was certain of something - she was talking about him. The best cardiologist in the country. Him. Do Kyungsoo.
“What is his name? Your fiance.”
“Boo Seungkwan.”
-
Kyungsoo was paged by Dr. Hong for an emergency surgery. As much as he wanted to stay and wait for April, he must save lives. He must save another lives. He couldn’t let other people die. Not in his hands. He wouldn’t repeat the same stupid mistake when he operated on Seungkwan. It was his biggest mistake - to not bring enough O negative blood because he was late at that time. Time was running out. Kyungsoo stood up, paid for his food and exited the cafe. He was in a rush. Little did he realize the figure of a female entering the cafe.
-
“I have a donour,” April said after Kyungsoo finished his last line of her favorite song. Kyungsoo was delighted. The corner of his lips curved upwards, felicitating her. However, she had a frown plastered on her beautiful face.
“What is it?”
“I’ll be going to all the way to Seattle for the surgery.” Kyungsoo took April’s soft hand and squeezed it slightly. “You’re going to be absolutely fine. Don’t be afraid.”
April held his hand tightly as if her life depended on Kyungsoo’s hand.
“I’m afraid of my life after I undergo the surgery.” Kyungsoo wanted to ask why but she cut him off. “I’m not ready to see your face. I can’t even imagine you. What if you are too beautiful? To the point that I have dreams about you?” Kyungsoo chuckled.
“Isn’t that great?”
“No. It means I have a replacement for Seungkwan in my heart. And I don’t want that. I’m not ready to move on,” she whispered. Kyungsoo caressed the back of her palm. April rested her head on the guy’s shoulder.
“You have to move on, anyway.” She sighed. “I know.” She then turned to him. “Can you please wait for me? Until I am ready to move on.” Kyungsoo could hear a hint of sorrow in her shaky voice.
“You will find me here someday. Always look for me. Please.”
-
Kyungsoo did one final touch on the patient’s heart and waited. Waited for heart to beat. One second. Two seconds. Dup dup dup. He was relieved.
“Good job, everyone. Another live is saved today.” He managed to save the patient. He didn’t make a mistake at all. He felt amazing. As he stepped out of the operation room, Sehun stopped him.
“You’re going to the cafe again?”
Kyungsoo looked up to the tall figure before him, furrowing his thick eyebrows. He then nodded.
“Who knows if she’s there by now.”
Kyungsoo was still hoping. After all these while, there was still a glimpse of hope in his heart.
He clearly didn’t took his time to visit the cafe. His instinct screamed that she would be there. After about five months waiting for her, he knew she would be there. This time, his instinct was strong. Stronger than ever. Stronger that the time he first approached her. Stronger.
When he stepped into the cafe, he was approached by soft melody from the piano. It was Indigo - his favorite piece from Yiruma. He wasted no time and his eyes quickly landed on the familiar figure of a lady playing the piano. April. Her hair was longer, almost shoulder-length now but he was sure that the lady was April. The person he longed for.
“April?”
The lady stopped dancing her fingers on the piano. She looked down, gulping.
“Are you Jeon April?”
Kyungsoo approached her. He put a hand on her shoulder but she stilled. She didn’t even respond.
“I’m Kyungsoo. Do Kyungsoo.”
His heart was beating fast.
“April?”
He turned her around to take a good look at her. It was April. Kyungsoo smiled, his inner self was jumping in felicity. But then he realized the hot crystals that rolled down her cheeks.
“What’s wrong?”
He immediately took out a handkerchief from his pocket and wiped the tears away.
“Tell me what’s wrong.”
April looked up. She took a deep breath.
“You are too beautiful.”
Kyungsoo grinned like a Cheshire cat. It was indeed kairos.
Angel of Blue Diamond Saturn!
