Friday, August 14, 2026 | 4:39 PM | 0 Alien
Dear Sabrina of June 10, 2026,Before you send that congratulations message, I wish I could sit beside you for a while.
Don't send it yet.
Not because you shouldn't.
But because I want you to know what that little message is going to set in motion.
Right now, you're probably telling yourself that you're being mature.
He is starting his first day as an MO.
You want to congratulate him.
You want to tell him you hope you can work together normally.
And you have this one little confession you've been carrying:
One of the reasons you liked him was because he was good at his job.
You think you're simply giving him something he deserves to hear.
You're trying to be kind.
You're trying to close a chapter properly.
You're trying to move forward.
And underneath all of that, you're a little scared.
Because you know yourself.
You know that if he comes back into your life, you might fall again.
And you're right.
You will.
But, Sabrina...
you don't know yet what that will look like.
---
Right now, you probably think moving on means making yourself stop loving him.
You think perhaps you need to become indifferent.
You need to be able to work beside him without feeling anything.
You need to hear his voice without remembering what it felt like when he used to want to talk to you every day.
You need to see him in the department and think:
He's just another MO.
You need to stop wondering what could have been.
You need to stop hoping.
And you're trying.
I know.
You've already spent months trying.
You told yourself:
It's over.
You told yourself:
He chose not to continue.
You told yourself:
I need to move on.
And perhaps the saddest part is that you genuinely believe you have to.
Because what else can you do?
You can't force someone to choose you.
You can't build a future with someone who isn't ready.
You can't keep waiting indefinitely.
So you're preparing yourself to let go.
And then you send:
> “Congrats on your first day.”
You don't know that those words are about to open a door.
---
Because when he reads your message, he doesn't just see congratulations.
He sees you.
And something in him moves.
He'll tell you that he has always felt like he wasn't enough.
That he works and works because he wants to feel useful.
Then he'll ask:
> “Sekarang ni awak ada berkenalan/in relationship dengan orang lain?”
And Sabrina...
You will stare at that message.
Because you weren't expecting it.
You were prepared for:
“Thank you.”
Maybe:
“Semoga awak pun baik-baik.”
Instead, he is asking whether someone else has your heart.
And when you ask him back, he'll say:
> “Tiada.”
And suddenly the door you were trying so hard to close isn't quite closed anymore.
---
He'll tell you things you have waited months to hear.
He'll explain why he stopped.
Not because you weren't good enough.
Not because he didn't like you.
Not because those three weeks meant nothing.
He stopped because he was scared.
He'll tell you:
> “Kalau ikut kan saya nak bercakap dengan awak setiap hari, tengok awak, dengar suara awak, bercerita.”
Sabrina...
Remember how badly you wanted that?
You once wanted nothing more than to hear him say that he wanted to talk to you.
And now he will.
But you won't immediately feel relieved.
You'll be scared.
Because wanting someone who has already hurt you is terrifying.
You'll wonder:
What if I fall again?
What if he changes his mind again?
What if I let myself hope and get hurt twice?
And the truth is...
You will fall again.
Harder, perhaps.
But this time, you'll know more about him.
And he'll know more about himself.
---
He'll tell you:
> “Dalam doa saya ada nama awak.”
You'll probably read that sentence more than once.
Because how are you supposed to hear something like that from someone you were actively trying to forget?
He'll tell you that if he doesn't end up with you, he genuinely hopes you find someone better.
And then he'll ask:
> “Boleh ke awak tunggu saya.”
Sabrina of June...
You don't know it yet, but this is where your heart begins to soften.
Not because he suddenly gives you everything.
He doesn't.
In fact, he'll be honest:
> “Saya tiada plan sekarang.”
He isn't promising you a wedding tomorrow.
He isn't magically becoming certain.
He is still scared.
Still thinking.
Still figuring himself out.
But this time, instead of walking away from the uncertainty...
he asks you to stay while he tries to become ready.
---
And I know you're going to be afraid of that.
You should be.
Because love isn't supposed to require you to abandon your boundaries.
You don't have to wait forever.
You don't have to put your life on hold.
You don't have to promise him that you'll never look at anyone else.
You don't have to become his girlfriend just because he finally came back.
You are allowed to say:
“I'll see what happens.”
You're allowed to move slowly.
You're allowed to protect yourself.
You're allowed to watch what he does instead of only listening to what he says.
And that's exactly what you'll do.
You'll watch.
And he'll show you.
---
You'll watch him start initiating conversations.
You'll watch him become more affectionate.
You'll hear him say sayang.
At first, you'll be shocked by it.
You'll wonder if you're imagining things.
Then he'll say it again.
And again.
And eventually, he'll say:
> “Saya sayang awak Aida.”
And you'll realize something.
The boy who once asked Allah to help him forget how much he wanted to talk to you...
is now calling you because he wants to talk to you.
---
You'll have a date.
He'll wear pink because you once said you wanted to see him in pink.
You'll accidentally match.
And you'll sit there thinking:
How is this my life?
Because June Sabrina is still trying to convince herself that she needs to move on.
And August Sabrina is going on dates with him.
Talking about marriage.
Talking about parents.
Talking about children.
Talking about careers.
Talking about the future.
---
There will be a night when your father comes into Resus.
And he'll go to greet him.
You will feel nervous because nobody really knows about the two of you.
You'll think:
Why is he going to salam my abah?
But he'll do it anyway.
Later, he'll tell you that he went looking for you.
He'll tell you that he saw you rushing around in your oversized blue sweater.
He'll tell you that he kept coming back to Resus to update you about your father's condition.
And you'll realize:
This isn't the same man who walked away from me in December.
He's still the same person.
Still imperfect.
Still overthinking.
Still sometimes terrible at replying.
Still exhausted.
Still figuring things out.
But he's no longer running from the fact that he cares about you.
---
And eventually, you'll ask him:
“Awak tak rindu saya ke?”
And he'll say:
> “Mestila. Saya rindu awak, rasa lama tak jumpa. Saya sayang awak Aida.”
You'll say:
> “Sayang awak juga.”
And June Sabrina...
I wish you could see yourself then.
Because the girl who was terrified of falling again is going to realize:
I did fall.
And somehow...
I'm okay.
---
You will still get hurt sometimes.
He'll be busy.
He'll forget to reply.
You'll sulk.
You'll wonder why a five-second “thank you” was apparently impossible.
You'll get angry.
You'll tell him when something hurts.
And he'll learn.
You won't suddenly become a perfectly secure girlfriend.
He won't suddenly become a perfectly communicative boyfriend.
You're both still human.
But something important will change.
You'll stop trying to make the relationship perfect before allowing yourself to enjoy it.
You'll start saying:
> “Takpe slow slow.”
And he'll say:
> “Kita try slow slow.”
That's enough.
For now.
---
So, June Sabrina...
Before you send that congratulations message, I want you to know:
You're not stupid for still loving him.
You're not weak for hoping.
You're not going backwards because your heart softens when he comes back.
And you're not betraying yourself by giving him another chance.
You are simply allowing yourself to see whether the person who hurt you has grown.
And he has.
Not completely.
Not perfectly.
But enough to come back and say:
“Saya masih ada nama awak dalam doa.”
Enough to ask:
“Boleh ke awak tunggu saya.”
Enough to tell you:
“Saya sayang awak.”
Enough to keep choosing you, slowly.
---
You were so afraid in June that falling for him again would mean losing yourself.
But you'll learn something:
Loving someone doesn't have to mean abandoning yourself.
You can love him and still have your career.
You can love him and still have boundaries.
You can love him and still tell him when you're hurt.
You can love him and still say, “You need to rest.”
You can love him and still expect him to make time for you.
You can love him and still say:
“I want you, but I also need to feel safe with you.”
And maybe that's what makes this second chapter different.
The first time, you loved him with hope.
This time, you're learning to love him with eyes open.
---
So send the message, Sabrina.
Say congratulations.
Tell him you hope you can work normally together.
Tell him something kind that you never got to tell him before.
You don't know that you're about to receive a message that will change the next few months of your life.
You don't know that the man you're congratulating for becoming an MO will eventually become the man who tells you:
“Good morning sayangku.”
You don't know that he'll help you study.
That he'll talk to your father.
That he'll search for you in Resus.
That he'll wear pink for you.
That he'll call you his future.
That he'll tell you he keeps falling for you.
You don't know that the person you're trying so hard to move on from will become someone you're learning how to love again.
So don't be afraid of the girl you're about to become.
She won't be the girl who failed to move on.
She'll be the girl who discovered that sometimes...
moving forward doesn't always mean moving away.
Sometimes it means turning around, looking at the person who came back, and asking:
“Okay. What are we going to do differently this time?”
And then, together,
you find out.
Love,
Sabrina, August 14, 2026 🩵
Angel of Blue Diamond Saturn!
