Express The Angel

________________________________________________________________________________________

Friday, November 29, 2013 | 12:05 AM | 0 Alien

Suzy grows up believing in fairy tales. But do fairy tales exist?

She kept on tearing those papers off the book. She knew deep inside her heart she didn’t have the guts to tear them off, no, not her own book. She was left in this pitch of darkness in her life and this was the part where she didn’t even know herself anymore. She even questioned her believes in happy ending. Would there still be happy ending for her?

Suzy grew up believing in fairy tales. Every fairytale has happy ending. She believed happy ending. That was the only thing that kept her happy. She was still a happy-go-lucky girl when she first met the tall boy. Never did she know that the first encounter would actually bring her this far- too far from her real self.

Suzy ran, her breathing hitched and heavy, she was late for her part-time job. She took a very quick glance on her Disney-themed watch before bumping into a man, making his documents to splatter over the hard tarred ground. She cursed herself under her breath, immediately kneeled down to help him, picking up his black-inked documents.

“Sorry.” she looked up and saw a man about 185 cm standing in front of her, looking at her with worry. He was a fine man- great feature with short black hair and a black shirt covering his tall slender body.

“Are you okay?” his voice was low and deep, covered with worry. She flashed a small smile and nodded before she ran away from him, off to her work.

Suzy continued tearing those papers off. She didn’t know why she did that while the books had been published already. They were in sale; all over the bookstores around Korea. Everything was too late for her to redo it. She couldn’t rewind the time.

“What would you like to order, sir?” she said, ready with a black pen and sticky notes. It was 4.15 in the cloudy evening, just a very few moments before her shift ended. The customer looked through the menu, over and over again, before asking for his favorite menu.

“Here is your piece of strawberry cheesecake and a cup of hot coffee. Please enjoy your meal!” she looked up to find the man from that day with a pair of Gucci spectacles. Anyone could have notice the spectacles- they were limited edition and very shining.

“You!” the man exclaimed, only to earn a gasp from her. He was sorry to see her surprised, he wasn’t meant to surprise her. “Sorry,” he grinned, flashing his white beautiful teeth.

“Here.” A familiar Cinderella brooch appeared in front of her. It looked exactly like her missing favorite brooch. “Yours, I found it that day but when I looked up, you were not there anymore,” he said, mentioning her to take it. She took it and grinned to him, keeping the pink brooch in her pocket.

“I’m Park Chanyeol.”

Suzy was in verge of tears. She knew everything was her own fault. If she wasn’t late to her part-time work that day, she wouldn’t be in this kind of state, she wouldn’t be so pathetic, and she wouldn’t be so devastated.

Suzy jogged along the Han River as she let the music flow through her body. Her breath was heavy as her steps matched the beat of the music. One foot after another, she had been jogging since 4 in the morning up until now. She was tired, but she had to exercise to keep her healthy. She had to be healthy. She was sick of being sick; she was tired of having to go to the hospital. She had enough.

“Bam!” lightning stroke as raindrops poured heavily. Shock took over her as she ran quickly to find a shelter for awhile. She couldn’t let herself drench in the rain. She couldn’t stand rain. She hated rain, and she hated everything about the weather.

Suzy stood under the bus stop, she was soaked in the rain, everything was drenched and wet. Her mp3 played a sad song, weird, she thought, she didn’t realize she had Navi’s Incurable Disease in her mp3 before. She let the music play as she looked down to her drenched shoes. The beat was slow, the meaning was deep and the song itself was gloomy. She looked up, only to see everything was dull. She smiled painfully to herself, tears spilled as she was immersed into the song.

Will I be able to say I love you once again?
I throw you out and throw you out but in the end, I’m filled up by you
No matter how hard I try to erase you, it’s like an incurable disease
I can’t stop this love that spreads throughout my body

The price of ruining our relationship
can’t I hold you as much as we were in pain?
With the reason of loving you, there wasn’t a day that I didn’t love you

“Funny, I can never relate to that.” Suzy sighed. Her tears dried as she looked at her watch. 6.30 a.m. She needed to go home by now; she had to continue writing her book. But the rain, it didn’t stop, it became even heavier. God, she thought, she really needed to go home. Her book was due in a month, she must finish it fast.

“This is why I hate rain.” She mumbled under her breath. She rummaged her pocket to find her phone, but she only found some money and her mp3. She put down her headphones as she cursed herself for not bringing her phone in this situation.

“Hey!” a deep voice exclaimed, making her startled. She turned to her left, and found a tall man running towards her with an umbrella.

“We meet again!” Chanyeol said with a grin plastered on his handsome face. Suzy flashed him a smile before nodded. He looked at her up and down; she was really drenched, indeed. Upon his stare, she flinched a bit, and tried to start a conversation.

“What are you doing here?” her voice cracked.

“I’m on my way home but I see you here so I stop… to say hi.”He rubbed his neck in awkwardness. He bit his lips as his eyes darted everywhere but Suzy. She looked up to see his eyes.

“You live nearby?”

“Yeah, a few blocks from here. You wanna come?” her eyes grew bigger.

“I mean- you know, you’re really wet right now and you might catch a cold and this rain- I don’t think it’s going to stop anytime soon so maybe you can-“

“I’m okay.” She interrupted before the man could continue his awkward sentence. “Do you have a phone with you right now?” she asked, really expecting him to bring one.

“Ah, I left it at home. Sorry.” Suzy sighed. She looked around, in case there was at least a taxi for her to go home. “Umm… What about I walk you home?” he suggested with a shy smile on his face.

“Can you?” He nodded in excitement. “I’m not going to burden you?” He shook his head.

“Really? Thank you!”

Tears were still rolling down her cheeks. Her sobbing became heavier. Suzy shouldn’t have agreed on his suggestion. She knew she shouldn’t have agreed on anything related to him. It was sinful, and she could never be forgiven for this sin.

The house was cozy and warm, giving the comfortable vibe to both of them. Chanyeol found himself observing every single thing on the house, as Suzy excused herself to change her clothes. It was amusing for him to see the simple yet beautiful house. It didn’t have that many furniture but everything was perfect; the way she organized the books, the way she portrayed her interest in fairy tales through the pictures on the wall, everything, everything was more than perfect to him. But something caught his interest- she got way too many things with fairy tales pictures on them.

“Here, your coffee.” He was startled. Suzy put the cup on the glass coffee table, and sat on the grey couch, right beside Chanyeol. She played with her fingers, feeling the awkward environment. Chanyeol, on the other hand, was enjoying the amusing things he was seeing.

“What are you looking at?” she asked, not really expecting him to answer the question. She just wanted to have a conversation with him, or anything that could let her out of the silence.

“You like fairy tales?” Chanyeol turned to her. Her eyes literally shined upon hearing the word fairy tales. Eagerly, she nodded.

“They have happy ending, isn’t it great?!” He smirked.

“Don’t you know? Fairy tales have creepy endings.” He took a sip on the black coffee. She flinched a bit, as she shifted her seat to have a better look at the man beside her.

“I’m talking about the Disney ones.”

“I’m talking about the original ones.” Suzy paused. She never knew about the original tales. She had always thought the Disney ones were original and real. She loved everything about the Disney fairy tales, especially the endings. Happy ending – that was what she longed for.

“Why do you love fairy tales?” Chanyeol asked, noticing the silence that wrapped around them.

“They have the best ending in the world – happy ending.” Chanyeol broke into laughter. He never believed such things. Life is cruel; there will never be happy ending.

“Fairy tales are bullshits.” He spat. Suzy was taken aback.

“And why do you think so?” Chanyeol stood up, heading to the balcony. It was really refreshing from up there. The rain had stopped awhile ago. Suzy followed the man, breathing the refreshing smell of the breeze.

“Cause there’s no such thing as happy ending.” He smiled painfully to himself. A tear eventually escaped his left eye but he quickly wiped it off. The girl, on the other hand, was mad.

“So now you’re going to tell me that I’m an idiot for believing such things?” she questioned. She walked towards the kitchen to have some water to calm her down as Chanyeol closed the sliding doors on the balcony. He sensed the tense between them. Girls, he thought, as he looked at a Sleeping Beauty notebook and a pen placed on the table near the couch.

“I’m going home. Thanks for the coffee.” Suzy turned to him.

“You haven’t answered my question yet.” She walked him towards the door.

“You look tired. Have some rest, okay? Goodbye!” he ruffled her brown hair before he went home. She closed the door behind her, sighing. Her feet brought her into the living room. She switched on the tv and pressed the Disney channel.

“Weird, I don’t remember it was here before,” she said, taking a look on the notebook. She picked it up and that was when she realized, it wasn’t her who put it on the table, but Chanyeol.

To: Miss Fairy Tale

I’m not telling you that you’re an idiot for believing such things, you never are, and it’s just that we have different perspective of thinking. Well, you want to know a secret?

.

.

.

You look cuter when you’re mad.

010-849-5968 call me

Suzy didn’t know how much longer she could cry. She was tired. The book was ripped apart; it was in little pieces. She cursed herself over and over again. She banged herself on the wall, hoping everything was just a nightmare.

Suzy was really immersed into the story of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2, the part when Fred died. She had been a big fan of the Weasley twins, and she still couldn’t get over the fact that Fred had died, even if she had watched it more than 10 times. She sobbed like there was no tomorrow; she was in a mess, even though it was only a story.

“Ding dong!” someone rang the doorbell. Shit, she cursed under her breath, pressing the pause button on the remote. Wiping off her tears, she opened the door. Chanyeol stood in front of her with a bouquet of roses and baby’s breath, plastering a big grin in front of her.

“For you,” he beamed, shoving the bouquet of flowers towards her. She took it without reading the note hidden behind those roses and put the bouquet in an empty vintage vase near the shoes rack. He walked into the house leisurely, as if he owned the house.

“Excuse you, Park Chanyeol, but this is my house.” Suzy closed the door and followed him towards the living room. It was still early in the morning and she didn’t get why he came to her house that early.

“You watch Harry Potter?” he asked, totally ignoring her statement earlier. She crossed her leg as she played the movie.

“I’m not that ignorant to only watch fairy tales,” she spoke, shaking her head in disbelief. She guessed he didn’t eat breakfast yet, so she headed to the kitchen and prepared some breakfast for them.

“And I’m not that stupid to think you only watch fairy tales.” Chanyeol threw himself on the couch, casually laying down on it, and stretched his hands.

“Talking about fairy tales, we haven’t finished discussing about it earlier this month.” The tall man looked at her, who was making pancakes for both of them, with a serious expression.

“No, we finished talking about it.” She noticed the change on his face.

“Tell me, giant, why you don’t like fairy tales and happy endings?” he shifted his position, not feeling comfortable all of the sudden due to her question. He finally stood up, walking towards Suzy, he turned off the stove.

“Hey, I’m ma-“he pushed her to the refrigerator.

“It’s funny how people keep on believing happy ending while they know every story ends with a death.” It hit her right in the heart.

“Wh- What do you mean?” her voice cracked. His grip on her was so strong and she couldn’t even break free from him.

“People are going to die anyway,” he paused.

“No one will live forever.” He let her free after awhile, pretending nothing had ever happened after that.

“So, what are you making?” he sat on the counter with an innocent expression wore on his face. She sighed and continued preparing the breakfast.

Silence wrapped around them as they ate their breakfast quietly. Suzy munched on her apples as her eyes glued to the Cinderella tale that was showing on Disney while Chanyeol, on the other hand, was feeling weird. He couldn’t stand awkwardness and silence.

“You should stop watching fairy tales. You’re growing old,” he spoke, taking a sip on the refreshing orange juice. She looked at him in disbelief.

“Please, I will never be too old for fairy tales.”

“Well, I’d rather hear you say ‘I will never be too old for Spongebob’,” he stated, eating his pancake. It was heavenly but even heavenly food didn’t taste good in this kind of situation – awkward and weird.

“I still don’t get it why you offend me liking fairy tales that much!” she needed explanation from him – a very long one to make her understand. Instead of giving her explanation, the man shrugged.

“Happy ending gives you hopes, it’s bad.” Suzy paused for awhile. She thought of the meaning but then she shrugged. She would never understand his words.

“Are you a poet or something? Cause I still don’t get what you said,” she spoke. Chanyeol almost choked the pancake due to her question. He remembered telling her that he was a model, right on their second encounter, in the café.

“You grow up believing you would find your prince charming one day but funny, he will never come; it only happens in a story.” He put the dish into the sink, washing it. Suzy sat on the counter, watching him with amaze as he washed the dish neatly. He wasn’t like any other guys she ever knew; he could wash the dish properly, he was weird, and he was definitely unique for offending her love for fairy tales.

“What if I’ve found my prince charming?” Chanyeol ignored her question for awhile, putting off the gloves. Both of them were now seated on the couch with Cinderella movie playing on the screen. Silence wrapped around them but none of them was feeling awkward. They had adapted to the silence.

“Who is your prince charming, if you’ve found one?”

“You,” she answered. It was very quick, and unbelievable of her.

“Please, I’m not your prince charming. I don’t have all the traits and most important of all, I don’t want to be a prince charming. It’s stupid.” His voice was stern and really deep. He stood up, ready to leave.

“You always go home after you say some stupid things.” She walked him towards the door. She then remembered about the flowers earlier and she asked, “Why did you bring flowers for me just now?”

“Invitation,” he answered, putting on his Converse shoes. They were blue, matched with his worn-out jeans, giving off the casual look to him.

“My birthday is next week and I’m thinking of spending it with you. Hope you don’t mind.” She plastered a smile on her face and nodded, telling him she would definitely celebrate his birthday together. His face lighted up.

“Thank you! I love you, bye!” he gave her a very quick peck on the forehead before running away.

Suzy gained conscious. Right then, she knew, she shouldn’t have believed in fairy tales. She should’ve listened to Chanyeol, she should’ve stopped this stupid fantasy of her. Everything she ever fantasized would never come true, everything, including happy ending.

Suzy lay on the mat, together with Chanyeol, looking at the stars. The man had driven into his Dreamland just a few moments ago. She sighed, taking a glance on her Disney-themed watch. It was half past 10. She had been waiting for 12.00 a.m. for quite awhile now. The couple was there after their dinner together, after a ‘brilliant’ suggestion Suzy had made. She thought being together on a hill would give them a romantic scene. She thought they could have some lovey-dovey time together but she guessed not. Chanyeol slept right when she started to talk about fairy tales; how lucky the heroines of fairy tales were – they had a prince charming of their own and above all, they lived happily ever after.

“Chanyeol…” she spoke. She studied his features. She loved to see how peaceful he looked when he was sleeping. A small grin appeared on her face right before she knew it. Her fingers were playing with his face right before she realized it. And it hit her. She was in love.

“You’re still my prince charming.” Chanyeol mumbled something in his sleep.

“I love you,” she confessed, giving a soft peck on his forehead. She lay beside him, closing the gap between them.

“I want us to stay like this forever, even if it’s in my dream.” She closed her eyes.

Suzy woke up right on 11.50 p.m. Stretching her arms, she sat still on the mat. Chanyeol was still in his deep slumber, mumbling some things she couldn’t understand. Her cold hand reached him, waking him up.

“Hmmmm” he mumbled, still not opening his eyes. He was a sleepyhead; he could sleep for 16 hours sometimes.

“Wake up, you idiot!” His eyes fluttered open due to Suzy’s high-pitched voice. He was literally startled.

“I got something to tell you,” she said, moving towards him. Her watch showed 11.59 p.m. One more minute, she thought, closing the gap between them. Tick, 12.00 a.m., her watch glowed in the pitch of darkness.

“Happy birthday, Park Chanyeol,” she whispered. Her sweet voice echoed in his ears, sending electricity to his spine. She snaked an arm around his waist and pulled him so that there was no gap between them. Chanyeol stiffed for awhile before relaxing into the hug. Inhaling her rose scent, Chanyeol just wanted the time to stop. He wanted to stay like this forever, with his dream girl. He had a big crush on her since their second encounter and later, the feelings for her started to develop in him and it eventually grew bigger every day.

“Your present.” She handed him the beautifully-wrapped present, mentioning him to take it. He hesitated; he didn’t really expect her to give him a present. He just expected her, with a big smile on her face.

“Looks like a book,” he said before taking the present.

“Feels like a book,” he stated. Suzy grinned.

“It is a book.” He gave her the disgusted face. She shrugged.

“You’re not giving me a fairy tale book, are you?” she broke into laughter. She was still conscious; she was not crazy enough to give the guy who offended her interest in fairy tales a fairy tale book.

“Open it up,” she told him, expecting to his reaction. He opened the present in just 5 seconds, feeling relieved. It was not a fairy tale book but it was…

“Efflorescence Hope by Bae Suzy,” he read the title. The book was thick; 390 pages with a thick cover of fairy tales and a shining light that hovered over them. It was an artistic illusion, Chanyeol thought.

“My fifth book,” she grinned.

“It’ll be published today, 27^th of November, right on your birthday.” He looked at her, amazed. He was touched. He felt special. He could feel his love towards her was getting stronger.

“What is it about?”He flipped the book into some pages.

“It’s mostly about hopes and miracles. How I survive the lung cancer, everything, I want to give people like me hopes.”

“When love starts to bloom and he still doesn’t notice it, let him go.” The first dialogue of the page said. Chanyeol tilted his head in confusion. What does it mean? He wondered.

“What if you let him go but he is actually your true love?” he questioned. Suzy shook her head in disbelief. Funny, she thought, how could she even be in love with this guy who had a very different perspective of thinking from her?

“If he comes back, he is yours. But if he doesn’t, he is never yours.” Chanyeol flipped into another page.

“Each day is meaningful in its own way,” he read out loud. He looked up to see the beautiful girl, hoping for her explanation.

“Going through the chemotherapy is hard, especially when you know you won’t ever recover, but you know, you just have to enjoy every day of your life,” she said, suddenly reminiscing the hard times she faced during those days. It was really hard but she endured it with the efflorescence hopes of her. She prayed every single day; she just wanted some more time, just some time until she found her prince charming, she wanted a happy ending with her prince charming. A tear escaped her eye before she knew it.

“Old memories are beautiful just the way they are.” Suzy looked up to see the man who was reading some random dialogues in the book. She felt really relieved that now she found her prince charming. Everything was way too perfect. She got her prince charming, her book was published, everything, it was a blessing for her.

“Thank you, God.”

Suzy laughed hysterically. Tears didn’t even stop pouring. Right then she realized; it was her prayer that got her into this kind of situation. She wanted some more time until she could find a prince charming and she did, so now she should pay the price – the price for living.

Chanyeol let out a heavy sigh. He was still in the middle of the photo shoot yet he was really worried about Suzy. She was having a mild fever and she even got joint pain. She didn’t want to meet the doctor, she was fine, she said. It was only a fever, but he knew, it was more than fever. Her face was rather pale these days and her breath was really short. She couldn’t even lift some light things. Her grip was weaker than ever and it was never fine.

“Alright,” she said before she ended the conversation. Chanyeol had been telling her to go to the hospital and this time, she said yes, she agreed to see the doctor. He insisted to accompany her but she wanted to go alone. She was fine, again, she reassured him. He promised her to meet her after that and again, she agreed.

Suzy knew better than Chanyeol. She was not that stupid to let herself suffer from the pain. She had seen the doctor before he told her to. She had blood and bone marrow test days ago, and she was now waiting for the results, in front of the doctor.

“You said you had lung cancer before?” Dr. Yifan asked, examining her results. The room was really cold to the girl, and she didn’t know why. She was literally shaking, effloresce hopes were everywhere in her heart.

“Yeah, about 5 or 6 years ago, I guess” she answered. Her heart was pounding fast. Beads of cold sweat appeared on her forehead unknowingly. Her eyes darted everywhere but the doctor.

“I’m sorry…” that was the only thing he could say, before giving her the test results.

Chanyeol opened the door, it was unlocked. His heart didn’t feel good though. He took some steps into the house before hearing some sounds coming from Suzy’s room. She left the door ajar, and he pushed the door, only to find her laughing, with pieces of papers around her. The room was practically a mess.

“What happened to you?!” he realized there were tears on her cheeks. She continued laughing at how stupid she was to let everything to be like that. Stupid, she laughed, I should’ve died 5 years ago. She couldn’t stop herself, even if she wanted to, because there was nothing she could do, but to let go of everything.

“You’re so stupid, Suzy, you don’t deserve to live!” Chanyeol was at loss of words. He didn’t know what to say to her, he didn’t know what to do – he was just confused. This girl had been so happy; she never cried in front of him but look at how pathetic she was now, laughing like a mad woman, crying like there was no tomorrow. He only wanted to know a thing – was she fine? He wanted to know that she was fine but the view in front of him told him otherwise.

“What’s wrong with you?” he shook her really hard. She was hurt by his grip but she didn’t stop laughing. Everything was funny to her now – how he pretended as if he cared about her while they were not lovers, they were never a lover.

“I should’ve died 5 years ago,” she whispered, her voice laced with emotions and pain.

“What are you-“

“I got leukemia, Chanyeol! I got a fucking leukemia!” she sobbed hard. The time seemed as if it was stopping. He felt as if this world was empty. The word leukemia echoed in his ears. It was the word he hated the most, if people ever asked. His mother died because of chronic myelogenous leukemia years ago and now, his love, his everything was suffering the same stupid cancer. He cursed under his breath.

“Life is very cruel” he spat. Why me, he thought as tears brimmed in his eyes, making his vision blurry. He couldn’t see clearly but he was really sure Suzy was crying again in front of him. Suzy, on the other hand, had actually stopped crying. She was tired of everything. She was tired of surviving and trying to survive – it was like she was climbing the mountain. She fell when she was almost near the peak of the mountain, and she had to hold on the cliff in order to survive and she did survive. But then again, when she was just a few steps to reach the peak, she fell again and this time, she was struggling to survive. She just had enough.

“Can you help me?” she spoke, more to a whisper to him. He looked right into her eyes, they were in pain, he could tell.

“Kill me.” Chanyeol sobbed. “Kill me!”

“We can always try to get you cured,” he said, with a little bit of hope in his heart.

“No, I have no hope left. The doctor said I will survive another 5 months, maximum.” She whimpered. “Everything is too late, Chanyeol.”

“So you’re going to give up before you fight? What a coward.”

“Cause there is no happy ending for me anymore.” She sobbed. “Don’t you get it?”

“I can never be cured.” Chanyeol pressed his lips against her.

“Why do you need happy ending when you have a happy life?” He asked, wanting for her explanation. Happy ending didn’t exist, why couldn’t she understand?

“Because life is so cruel and I need happy ending to make it seem beautiful.” Silence fell. None of them talked for awhile, maybe that was the right choice for the time being. They needed some space to think. They were tired, this world had been too cruel for them, and they just had enough.

Days passed, changed into weeks, transformed into months. 3 months had passed, weird, time flies by too fast that they needed time to catch up their breath. Life had not been really good to them, not really. Their days filled with tears and sobs, and they could only count their days together. Chanyeol tried to be strong for Suzy, but he himself was not strong enough.

“I want to go out,” she spoke. She lay down on the hospital bed, looking at Chanyeol who was holding her hand. She was getting thinner that she looked so fragile.

“You can’t,” he said, pressing his lip on her hand. Oh how he missed her warm hand that used to fit into his. She looked out through the window, only to see the blue sky and some birds flying happily together. She wanted to be free before she died. She didn’t want to be a weak animal that was kept in the zoo with no freedom and died in sadness without feeling the true meaning of freedom. She just wanted to go out, just for a day, for the last time, before she closed her eyes forever.

“One last time, please…”

Suzy found herself walking hand-in-hand with Chanyeol at the botanical garden of Seoul. Dr. Yifan gave her permission to go out, but just for a day. A day would be so enough, she said, telling him she would be perfectly fine with the refreshing breeze outside.

“Tell me if you’re tired.” Suzy nodded. Their paces were slow and steady, as both of them enjoyed the view in front of them. It was really beautiful, colorful and peaceful. Looking at the flowers, she felt a little piece of hope in her heart.

“Look! Roses and there’s baby’s breath!” Chanyeol pointed to her. She flashed a weak smile to him, suddenly reminding the flowers in the vase near the shoes rack. They must’ve died by now, she thought, suddenly feeling down-beat.

“The flowers you gave me are dead by now, I guess.” They sat on a wooden bench right in front of the roses. She wasn’t fond of roses but she did take good care of the flowers Chanyeol gave. They were precious. She could never get a bouquet of flowers anymore.

“No, you’re wrong.” She put her head on his shoulder. “I put a plastic rose there, to mean that I will always love you, and my love for you will never die.”

“You should find someone for you, you know, someone who can take care of you, someone who can love you more than I do and such, cause you know I’m incapable to do anything right now.” He shook his head in disagreement.

“I want you to recover. And then, we can marry, get 4 kids together, and have grandchildren and such. We can do things together, you can write books about me, I can do photo shoots with you, and we can have our happy end-“

“It will never happen, Chanyeol,” she interrupted before the man could go on with his fantasy. “There is no happy ending for me anymore.”

“You should relax a bit and try to imagine things. You know, like happy ending or something. You always love happy ending, think of a happy ending with me, your prince charming, and you, as the heroin of your own fairy tale. Imagine… The power of imagination will give you hopes,” he said, still looking at the flowers in front of them.

“Write a fairy tale with our happy memories.”

“Once, there lived a very beautiful girl in Seoul city named Suzy. She loved fairy tales so much that she didn’t realize that she was living in a fairy tale of her own. One fine day, she bumped into a prince who was the most handsome guy in the world. The prince was Park Chanyeol. The prince was in love with her before he knew it. Fate brought them together as God kept letting them to meet each other accidentally. But then, she was sick – she got leukemia. She had the same cancer that took Chanyeol’s mother, Queen Hyemi’s life. They were both in despair but because of their effloresce hopes, they went through the obstacles and she survived and in the end-“

“They lived happily ever after.” Both of them said in unison. Suzy plastered a smile on her pale face, telling Chanyeol that it was a really great story.

“Thanks for the fairy tale, sweetheart. It’s so great.” She pecked him on his cheek before telling him that she was so tired.

“I- I want to get some rest. Don’t wake me up.” Before she could close her eyes, Chanyeol confessed, “I love you, with all my heart, I love you.” He pressed his lips against hers for awhile.

“I love you too, Chanyeol.” She closed her eyes, dozed off, or that was what he thought. She didn’t wake up after that, and Chanyeol didn’t even try to wake her up. Her breathing stopped but he kept hoping, hoping that it was just a dream. Funny, he never woke up from that dream. That was when he knew everything was true and it was too late. He couldn’t do anything. Maybe there was no happy ending but at least she was happy before she died.

AFF HERE

Pumpkin hilang, bila nak balik? Kakak rindu angkin.

Love you guys, bubblebye ^_^

PAST ♥ FUTURE

_______________________________________

Bubblehye

Assalamualaikum! Greetings, aliens from Saturn! You've stepped into BDA's world. Accept me for who I am or just get out of here. I don't bite.
Blue Diamond Angel

Reminiscing those moments when we were all together as one big family

_______________________________________

Say YO

_______________________________________

Sing With Me

_______________________________________

Big Claps

Basecode : Ana Min- Ji
Template : Sya Syahirah
Header : OneWifey
Tutorial : OneWifey
BestView : Google

______________________________________________________________________________________________

Blue Strawberry Chingus !

Effloresce Hopes

Friday, November 29, 2013 | 12:05 AM | 0 comments

Suzy grows up believing in fairy tales. But do fairy tales exist?

She kept on tearing those papers off the book. She knew deep inside her heart she didn’t have the guts to tear them off, no, not her own book. She was left in this pitch of darkness in her life and this was the part where she didn’t even know herself anymore. She even questioned her believes in happy ending. Would there still be happy ending for her?

Suzy grew up believing in fairy tales. Every fairytale has happy ending. She believed happy ending. That was the only thing that kept her happy. She was still a happy-go-lucky girl when she first met the tall boy. Never did she know that the first encounter would actually bring her this far- too far from her real self.

Suzy ran, her breathing hitched and heavy, she was late for her part-time job. She took a very quick glance on her Disney-themed watch before bumping into a man, making his documents to splatter over the hard tarred ground. She cursed herself under her breath, immediately kneeled down to help him, picking up his black-inked documents.

“Sorry.” she looked up and saw a man about 185 cm standing in front of her, looking at her with worry. He was a fine man- great feature with short black hair and a black shirt covering his tall slender body.

“Are you okay?” his voice was low and deep, covered with worry. She flashed a small smile and nodded before she ran away from him, off to her work.

Suzy continued tearing those papers off. She didn’t know why she did that while the books had been published already. They were in sale; all over the bookstores around Korea. Everything was too late for her to redo it. She couldn’t rewind the time.

“What would you like to order, sir?” she said, ready with a black pen and sticky notes. It was 4.15 in the cloudy evening, just a very few moments before her shift ended. The customer looked through the menu, over and over again, before asking for his favorite menu.

“Here is your piece of strawberry cheesecake and a cup of hot coffee. Please enjoy your meal!” she looked up to find the man from that day with a pair of Gucci spectacles. Anyone could have notice the spectacles- they were limited edition and very shining.

“You!” the man exclaimed, only to earn a gasp from her. He was sorry to see her surprised, he wasn’t meant to surprise her. “Sorry,” he grinned, flashing his white beautiful teeth.

“Here.” A familiar Cinderella brooch appeared in front of her. It looked exactly like her missing favorite brooch. “Yours, I found it that day but when I looked up, you were not there anymore,” he said, mentioning her to take it. She took it and grinned to him, keeping the pink brooch in her pocket.

“I’m Park Chanyeol.”

Suzy was in verge of tears. She knew everything was her own fault. If she wasn’t late to her part-time work that day, she wouldn’t be in this kind of state, she wouldn’t be so pathetic, and she wouldn’t be so devastated.

Suzy jogged along the Han River as she let the music flow through her body. Her breath was heavy as her steps matched the beat of the music. One foot after another, she had been jogging since 4 in the morning up until now. She was tired, but she had to exercise to keep her healthy. She had to be healthy. She was sick of being sick; she was tired of having to go to the hospital. She had enough.

“Bam!” lightning stroke as raindrops poured heavily. Shock took over her as she ran quickly to find a shelter for awhile. She couldn’t let herself drench in the rain. She couldn’t stand rain. She hated rain, and she hated everything about the weather.

Suzy stood under the bus stop, she was soaked in the rain, everything was drenched and wet. Her mp3 played a sad song, weird, she thought, she didn’t realize she had Navi’s Incurable Disease in her mp3 before. She let the music play as she looked down to her drenched shoes. The beat was slow, the meaning was deep and the song itself was gloomy. She looked up, only to see everything was dull. She smiled painfully to herself, tears spilled as she was immersed into the song.

Will I be able to say I love you once again?
I throw you out and throw you out but in the end, I’m filled up by you
No matter how hard I try to erase you, it’s like an incurable disease
I can’t stop this love that spreads throughout my body

The price of ruining our relationship
can’t I hold you as much as we were in pain?
With the reason of loving you, there wasn’t a day that I didn’t love you

“Funny, I can never relate to that.” Suzy sighed. Her tears dried as she looked at her watch. 6.30 a.m. She needed to go home by now; she had to continue writing her book. But the rain, it didn’t stop, it became even heavier. God, she thought, she really needed to go home. Her book was due in a month, she must finish it fast.

“This is why I hate rain.” She mumbled under her breath. She rummaged her pocket to find her phone, but she only found some money and her mp3. She put down her headphones as she cursed herself for not bringing her phone in this situation.

“Hey!” a deep voice exclaimed, making her startled. She turned to her left, and found a tall man running towards her with an umbrella.

“We meet again!” Chanyeol said with a grin plastered on his handsome face. Suzy flashed him a smile before nodded. He looked at her up and down; she was really drenched, indeed. Upon his stare, she flinched a bit, and tried to start a conversation.

“What are you doing here?” her voice cracked.

“I’m on my way home but I see you here so I stop… to say hi.”He rubbed his neck in awkwardness. He bit his lips as his eyes darted everywhere but Suzy. She looked up to see his eyes.

“You live nearby?”

“Yeah, a few blocks from here. You wanna come?” her eyes grew bigger.

“I mean- you know, you’re really wet right now and you might catch a cold and this rain- I don’t think it’s going to stop anytime soon so maybe you can-“

“I’m okay.” She interrupted before the man could continue his awkward sentence. “Do you have a phone with you right now?” she asked, really expecting him to bring one.

“Ah, I left it at home. Sorry.” Suzy sighed. She looked around, in case there was at least a taxi for her to go home. “Umm… What about I walk you home?” he suggested with a shy smile on his face.

“Can you?” He nodded in excitement. “I’m not going to burden you?” He shook his head.

“Really? Thank you!”

Tears were still rolling down her cheeks. Her sobbing became heavier. Suzy shouldn’t have agreed on his suggestion. She knew she shouldn’t have agreed on anything related to him. It was sinful, and she could never be forgiven for this sin.

The house was cozy and warm, giving the comfortable vibe to both of them. Chanyeol found himself observing every single thing on the house, as Suzy excused herself to change her clothes. It was amusing for him to see the simple yet beautiful house. It didn’t have that many furniture but everything was perfect; the way she organized the books, the way she portrayed her interest in fairy tales through the pictures on the wall, everything, everything was more than perfect to him. But something caught his interest- she got way too many things with fairy tales pictures on them.

“Here, your coffee.” He was startled. Suzy put the cup on the glass coffee table, and sat on the grey couch, right beside Chanyeol. She played with her fingers, feeling the awkward environment. Chanyeol, on the other hand, was enjoying the amusing things he was seeing.

“What are you looking at?” she asked, not really expecting him to answer the question. She just wanted to have a conversation with him, or anything that could let her out of the silence.

“You like fairy tales?” Chanyeol turned to her. Her eyes literally shined upon hearing the word fairy tales. Eagerly, she nodded.

“They have happy ending, isn’t it great?!” He smirked.

“Don’t you know? Fairy tales have creepy endings.” He took a sip on the black coffee. She flinched a bit, as she shifted her seat to have a better look at the man beside her.

“I’m talking about the Disney ones.”

“I’m talking about the original ones.” Suzy paused. She never knew about the original tales. She had always thought the Disney ones were original and real. She loved everything about the Disney fairy tales, especially the endings. Happy ending – that was what she longed for.

“Why do you love fairy tales?” Chanyeol asked, noticing the silence that wrapped around them.

“They have the best ending in the world – happy ending.” Chanyeol broke into laughter. He never believed such things. Life is cruel; there will never be happy ending.

“Fairy tales are bullshits.” He spat. Suzy was taken aback.

“And why do you think so?” Chanyeol stood up, heading to the balcony. It was really refreshing from up there. The rain had stopped awhile ago. Suzy followed the man, breathing the refreshing smell of the breeze.

“Cause there’s no such thing as happy ending.” He smiled painfully to himself. A tear eventually escaped his left eye but he quickly wiped it off. The girl, on the other hand, was mad.

“So now you’re going to tell me that I’m an idiot for believing such things?” she questioned. She walked towards the kitchen to have some water to calm her down as Chanyeol closed the sliding doors on the balcony. He sensed the tense between them. Girls, he thought, as he looked at a Sleeping Beauty notebook and a pen placed on the table near the couch.

“I’m going home. Thanks for the coffee.” Suzy turned to him.

“You haven’t answered my question yet.” She walked him towards the door.

“You look tired. Have some rest, okay? Goodbye!” he ruffled her brown hair before he went home. She closed the door behind her, sighing. Her feet brought her into the living room. She switched on the tv and pressed the Disney channel.

“Weird, I don’t remember it was here before,” she said, taking a look on the notebook. She picked it up and that was when she realized, it wasn’t her who put it on the table, but Chanyeol.

To: Miss Fairy Tale

I’m not telling you that you’re an idiot for believing such things, you never are, and it’s just that we have different perspective of thinking. Well, you want to know a secret?

.

.

.

You look cuter when you’re mad.

010-849-5968 call me

Suzy didn’t know how much longer she could cry. She was tired. The book was ripped apart; it was in little pieces. She cursed herself over and over again. She banged herself on the wall, hoping everything was just a nightmare.

Suzy was really immersed into the story of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2, the part when Fred died. She had been a big fan of the Weasley twins, and she still couldn’t get over the fact that Fred had died, even if she had watched it more than 10 times. She sobbed like there was no tomorrow; she was in a mess, even though it was only a story.

“Ding dong!” someone rang the doorbell. Shit, she cursed under her breath, pressing the pause button on the remote. Wiping off her tears, she opened the door. Chanyeol stood in front of her with a bouquet of roses and baby’s breath, plastering a big grin in front of her.

“For you,” he beamed, shoving the bouquet of flowers towards her. She took it without reading the note hidden behind those roses and put the bouquet in an empty vintage vase near the shoes rack. He walked into the house leisurely, as if he owned the house.

“Excuse you, Park Chanyeol, but this is my house.” Suzy closed the door and followed him towards the living room. It was still early in the morning and she didn’t get why he came to her house that early.

“You watch Harry Potter?” he asked, totally ignoring her statement earlier. She crossed her leg as she played the movie.

“I’m not that ignorant to only watch fairy tales,” she spoke, shaking her head in disbelief. She guessed he didn’t eat breakfast yet, so she headed to the kitchen and prepared some breakfast for them.

“And I’m not that stupid to think you only watch fairy tales.” Chanyeol threw himself on the couch, casually laying down on it, and stretched his hands.

“Talking about fairy tales, we haven’t finished discussing about it earlier this month.” The tall man looked at her, who was making pancakes for both of them, with a serious expression.

“No, we finished talking about it.” She noticed the change on his face.

“Tell me, giant, why you don’t like fairy tales and happy endings?” he shifted his position, not feeling comfortable all of the sudden due to her question. He finally stood up, walking towards Suzy, he turned off the stove.

“Hey, I’m ma-“he pushed her to the refrigerator.

“It’s funny how people keep on believing happy ending while they know every story ends with a death.” It hit her right in the heart.

“Wh- What do you mean?” her voice cracked. His grip on her was so strong and she couldn’t even break free from him.

“People are going to die anyway,” he paused.

“No one will live forever.” He let her free after awhile, pretending nothing had ever happened after that.

“So, what are you making?” he sat on the counter with an innocent expression wore on his face. She sighed and continued preparing the breakfast.

Silence wrapped around them as they ate their breakfast quietly. Suzy munched on her apples as her eyes glued to the Cinderella tale that was showing on Disney while Chanyeol, on the other hand, was feeling weird. He couldn’t stand awkwardness and silence.

“You should stop watching fairy tales. You’re growing old,” he spoke, taking a sip on the refreshing orange juice. She looked at him in disbelief.

“Please, I will never be too old for fairy tales.”

“Well, I’d rather hear you say ‘I will never be too old for Spongebob’,” he stated, eating his pancake. It was heavenly but even heavenly food didn’t taste good in this kind of situation – awkward and weird.

“I still don’t get it why you offend me liking fairy tales that much!” she needed explanation from him – a very long one to make her understand. Instead of giving her explanation, the man shrugged.

“Happy ending gives you hopes, it’s bad.” Suzy paused for awhile. She thought of the meaning but then she shrugged. She would never understand his words.

“Are you a poet or something? Cause I still don’t get what you said,” she spoke. Chanyeol almost choked the pancake due to her question. He remembered telling her that he was a model, right on their second encounter, in the café.

“You grow up believing you would find your prince charming one day but funny, he will never come; it only happens in a story.” He put the dish into the sink, washing it. Suzy sat on the counter, watching him with amaze as he washed the dish neatly. He wasn’t like any other guys she ever knew; he could wash the dish properly, he was weird, and he was definitely unique for offending her love for fairy tales.

“What if I’ve found my prince charming?” Chanyeol ignored her question for awhile, putting off the gloves. Both of them were now seated on the couch with Cinderella movie playing on the screen. Silence wrapped around them but none of them was feeling awkward. They had adapted to the silence.

“Who is your prince charming, if you’ve found one?”

“You,” she answered. It was very quick, and unbelievable of her.

“Please, I’m not your prince charming. I don’t have all the traits and most important of all, I don’t want to be a prince charming. It’s stupid.” His voice was stern and really deep. He stood up, ready to leave.

“You always go home after you say some stupid things.” She walked him towards the door. She then remembered about the flowers earlier and she asked, “Why did you bring flowers for me just now?”

“Invitation,” he answered, putting on his Converse shoes. They were blue, matched with his worn-out jeans, giving off the casual look to him.

“My birthday is next week and I’m thinking of spending it with you. Hope you don’t mind.” She plastered a smile on her face and nodded, telling him she would definitely celebrate his birthday together. His face lighted up.

“Thank you! I love you, bye!” he gave her a very quick peck on the forehead before running away.

Suzy gained conscious. Right then, she knew, she shouldn’t have believed in fairy tales. She should’ve listened to Chanyeol, she should’ve stopped this stupid fantasy of her. Everything she ever fantasized would never come true, everything, including happy ending.

Suzy lay on the mat, together with Chanyeol, looking at the stars. The man had driven into his Dreamland just a few moments ago. She sighed, taking a glance on her Disney-themed watch. It was half past 10. She had been waiting for 12.00 a.m. for quite awhile now. The couple was there after their dinner together, after a ‘brilliant’ suggestion Suzy had made. She thought being together on a hill would give them a romantic scene. She thought they could have some lovey-dovey time together but she guessed not. Chanyeol slept right when she started to talk about fairy tales; how lucky the heroines of fairy tales were – they had a prince charming of their own and above all, they lived happily ever after.

“Chanyeol…” she spoke. She studied his features. She loved to see how peaceful he looked when he was sleeping. A small grin appeared on her face right before she knew it. Her fingers were playing with his face right before she realized it. And it hit her. She was in love.

“You’re still my prince charming.” Chanyeol mumbled something in his sleep.

“I love you,” she confessed, giving a soft peck on his forehead. She lay beside him, closing the gap between them.

“I want us to stay like this forever, even if it’s in my dream.” She closed her eyes.

Suzy woke up right on 11.50 p.m. Stretching her arms, she sat still on the mat. Chanyeol was still in his deep slumber, mumbling some things she couldn’t understand. Her cold hand reached him, waking him up.

“Hmmmm” he mumbled, still not opening his eyes. He was a sleepyhead; he could sleep for 16 hours sometimes.

“Wake up, you idiot!” His eyes fluttered open due to Suzy’s high-pitched voice. He was literally startled.

“I got something to tell you,” she said, moving towards him. Her watch showed 11.59 p.m. One more minute, she thought, closing the gap between them. Tick, 12.00 a.m., her watch glowed in the pitch of darkness.

“Happy birthday, Park Chanyeol,” she whispered. Her sweet voice echoed in his ears, sending electricity to his spine. She snaked an arm around his waist and pulled him so that there was no gap between them. Chanyeol stiffed for awhile before relaxing into the hug. Inhaling her rose scent, Chanyeol just wanted the time to stop. He wanted to stay like this forever, with his dream girl. He had a big crush on her since their second encounter and later, the feelings for her started to develop in him and it eventually grew bigger every day.

“Your present.” She handed him the beautifully-wrapped present, mentioning him to take it. He hesitated; he didn’t really expect her to give him a present. He just expected her, with a big smile on her face.

“Looks like a book,” he said before taking the present.

“Feels like a book,” he stated. Suzy grinned.

“It is a book.” He gave her the disgusted face. She shrugged.

“You’re not giving me a fairy tale book, are you?” she broke into laughter. She was still conscious; she was not crazy enough to give the guy who offended her interest in fairy tales a fairy tale book.

“Open it up,” she told him, expecting to his reaction. He opened the present in just 5 seconds, feeling relieved. It was not a fairy tale book but it was…

“Efflorescence Hope by Bae Suzy,” he read the title. The book was thick; 390 pages with a thick cover of fairy tales and a shining light that hovered over them. It was an artistic illusion, Chanyeol thought.

“My fifth book,” she grinned.

“It’ll be published today, 27^th of November, right on your birthday.” He looked at her, amazed. He was touched. He felt special. He could feel his love towards her was getting stronger.

“What is it about?”He flipped the book into some pages.

“It’s mostly about hopes and miracles. How I survive the lung cancer, everything, I want to give people like me hopes.”

“When love starts to bloom and he still doesn’t notice it, let him go.” The first dialogue of the page said. Chanyeol tilted his head in confusion. What does it mean? He wondered.

“What if you let him go but he is actually your true love?” he questioned. Suzy shook her head in disbelief. Funny, she thought, how could she even be in love with this guy who had a very different perspective of thinking from her?

“If he comes back, he is yours. But if he doesn’t, he is never yours.” Chanyeol flipped into another page.

“Each day is meaningful in its own way,” he read out loud. He looked up to see the beautiful girl, hoping for her explanation.

“Going through the chemotherapy is hard, especially when you know you won’t ever recover, but you know, you just have to enjoy every day of your life,” she said, suddenly reminiscing the hard times she faced during those days. It was really hard but she endured it with the efflorescence hopes of her. She prayed every single day; she just wanted some more time, just some time until she found her prince charming, she wanted a happy ending with her prince charming. A tear escaped her eye before she knew it.

“Old memories are beautiful just the way they are.” Suzy looked up to see the man who was reading some random dialogues in the book. She felt really relieved that now she found her prince charming. Everything was way too perfect. She got her prince charming, her book was published, everything, it was a blessing for her.

“Thank you, God.”

Suzy laughed hysterically. Tears didn’t even stop pouring. Right then she realized; it was her prayer that got her into this kind of situation. She wanted some more time until she could find a prince charming and she did, so now she should pay the price – the price for living.

Chanyeol let out a heavy sigh. He was still in the middle of the photo shoot yet he was really worried about Suzy. She was having a mild fever and she even got joint pain. She didn’t want to meet the doctor, she was fine, she said. It was only a fever, but he knew, it was more than fever. Her face was rather pale these days and her breath was really short. She couldn’t even lift some light things. Her grip was weaker than ever and it was never fine.

“Alright,” she said before she ended the conversation. Chanyeol had been telling her to go to the hospital and this time, she said yes, she agreed to see the doctor. He insisted to accompany her but she wanted to go alone. She was fine, again, she reassured him. He promised her to meet her after that and again, she agreed.

Suzy knew better than Chanyeol. She was not that stupid to let herself suffer from the pain. She had seen the doctor before he told her to. She had blood and bone marrow test days ago, and she was now waiting for the results, in front of the doctor.

“You said you had lung cancer before?” Dr. Yifan asked, examining her results. The room was really cold to the girl, and she didn’t know why. She was literally shaking, effloresce hopes were everywhere in her heart.

“Yeah, about 5 or 6 years ago, I guess” she answered. Her heart was pounding fast. Beads of cold sweat appeared on her forehead unknowingly. Her eyes darted everywhere but the doctor.

“I’m sorry…” that was the only thing he could say, before giving her the test results.

Chanyeol opened the door, it was unlocked. His heart didn’t feel good though. He took some steps into the house before hearing some sounds coming from Suzy’s room. She left the door ajar, and he pushed the door, only to find her laughing, with pieces of papers around her. The room was practically a mess.

“What happened to you?!” he realized there were tears on her cheeks. She continued laughing at how stupid she was to let everything to be like that. Stupid, she laughed, I should’ve died 5 years ago. She couldn’t stop herself, even if she wanted to, because there was nothing she could do, but to let go of everything.

“You’re so stupid, Suzy, you don’t deserve to live!” Chanyeol was at loss of words. He didn’t know what to say to her, he didn’t know what to do – he was just confused. This girl had been so happy; she never cried in front of him but look at how pathetic she was now, laughing like a mad woman, crying like there was no tomorrow. He only wanted to know a thing – was she fine? He wanted to know that she was fine but the view in front of him told him otherwise.

“What’s wrong with you?” he shook her really hard. She was hurt by his grip but she didn’t stop laughing. Everything was funny to her now – how he pretended as if he cared about her while they were not lovers, they were never a lover.

“I should’ve died 5 years ago,” she whispered, her voice laced with emotions and pain.

“What are you-“

“I got leukemia, Chanyeol! I got a fucking leukemia!” she sobbed hard. The time seemed as if it was stopping. He felt as if this world was empty. The word leukemia echoed in his ears. It was the word he hated the most, if people ever asked. His mother died because of chronic myelogenous leukemia years ago and now, his love, his everything was suffering the same stupid cancer. He cursed under his breath.

“Life is very cruel” he spat. Why me, he thought as tears brimmed in his eyes, making his vision blurry. He couldn’t see clearly but he was really sure Suzy was crying again in front of him. Suzy, on the other hand, had actually stopped crying. She was tired of everything. She was tired of surviving and trying to survive – it was like she was climbing the mountain. She fell when she was almost near the peak of the mountain, and she had to hold on the cliff in order to survive and she did survive. But then again, when she was just a few steps to reach the peak, she fell again and this time, she was struggling to survive. She just had enough.

“Can you help me?” she spoke, more to a whisper to him. He looked right into her eyes, they were in pain, he could tell.

“Kill me.” Chanyeol sobbed. “Kill me!”

“We can always try to get you cured,” he said, with a little bit of hope in his heart.

“No, I have no hope left. The doctor said I will survive another 5 months, maximum.” She whimpered. “Everything is too late, Chanyeol.”

“So you’re going to give up before you fight? What a coward.”

“Cause there is no happy ending for me anymore.” She sobbed. “Don’t you get it?”

“I can never be cured.” Chanyeol pressed his lips against her.

“Why do you need happy ending when you have a happy life?” He asked, wanting for her explanation. Happy ending didn’t exist, why couldn’t she understand?

“Because life is so cruel and I need happy ending to make it seem beautiful.” Silence fell. None of them talked for awhile, maybe that was the right choice for the time being. They needed some space to think. They were tired, this world had been too cruel for them, and they just had enough.

Days passed, changed into weeks, transformed into months. 3 months had passed, weird, time flies by too fast that they needed time to catch up their breath. Life had not been really good to them, not really. Their days filled with tears and sobs, and they could only count their days together. Chanyeol tried to be strong for Suzy, but he himself was not strong enough.

“I want to go out,” she spoke. She lay down on the hospital bed, looking at Chanyeol who was holding her hand. She was getting thinner that she looked so fragile.

“You can’t,” he said, pressing his lip on her hand. Oh how he missed her warm hand that used to fit into his. She looked out through the window, only to see the blue sky and some birds flying happily together. She wanted to be free before she died. She didn’t want to be a weak animal that was kept in the zoo with no freedom and died in sadness without feeling the true meaning of freedom. She just wanted to go out, just for a day, for the last time, before she closed her eyes forever.

“One last time, please…”

Suzy found herself walking hand-in-hand with Chanyeol at the botanical garden of Seoul. Dr. Yifan gave her permission to go out, but just for a day. A day would be so enough, she said, telling him she would be perfectly fine with the refreshing breeze outside.

“Tell me if you’re tired.” Suzy nodded. Their paces were slow and steady, as both of them enjoyed the view in front of them. It was really beautiful, colorful and peaceful. Looking at the flowers, she felt a little piece of hope in her heart.

“Look! Roses and there’s baby’s breath!” Chanyeol pointed to her. She flashed a weak smile to him, suddenly reminding the flowers in the vase near the shoes rack. They must’ve died by now, she thought, suddenly feeling down-beat.

“The flowers you gave me are dead by now, I guess.” They sat on a wooden bench right in front of the roses. She wasn’t fond of roses but she did take good care of the flowers Chanyeol gave. They were precious. She could never get a bouquet of flowers anymore.

“No, you’re wrong.” She put her head on his shoulder. “I put a plastic rose there, to mean that I will always love you, and my love for you will never die.”

“You should find someone for you, you know, someone who can take care of you, someone who can love you more than I do and such, cause you know I’m incapable to do anything right now.” He shook his head in disagreement.

“I want you to recover. And then, we can marry, get 4 kids together, and have grandchildren and such. We can do things together, you can write books about me, I can do photo shoots with you, and we can have our happy end-“

“It will never happen, Chanyeol,” she interrupted before the man could go on with his fantasy. “There is no happy ending for me anymore.”

“You should relax a bit and try to imagine things. You know, like happy ending or something. You always love happy ending, think of a happy ending with me, your prince charming, and you, as the heroin of your own fairy tale. Imagine… The power of imagination will give you hopes,” he said, still looking at the flowers in front of them.

“Write a fairy tale with our happy memories.”

“Once, there lived a very beautiful girl in Seoul city named Suzy. She loved fairy tales so much that she didn’t realize that she was living in a fairy tale of her own. One fine day, she bumped into a prince who was the most handsome guy in the world. The prince was Park Chanyeol. The prince was in love with her before he knew it. Fate brought them together as God kept letting them to meet each other accidentally. But then, she was sick – she got leukemia. She had the same cancer that took Chanyeol’s mother, Queen Hyemi’s life. They were both in despair but because of their effloresce hopes, they went through the obstacles and she survived and in the end-“

“They lived happily ever after.” Both of them said in unison. Suzy plastered a smile on her pale face, telling Chanyeol that it was a really great story.

“Thanks for the fairy tale, sweetheart. It’s so great.” She pecked him on his cheek before telling him that she was so tired.

“I- I want to get some rest. Don’t wake me up.” Before she could close her eyes, Chanyeol confessed, “I love you, with all my heart, I love you.” He pressed his lips against hers for awhile.

“I love you too, Chanyeol.” She closed her eyes, dozed off, or that was what he thought. She didn’t wake up after that, and Chanyeol didn’t even try to wake her up. Her breathing stopped but he kept hoping, hoping that it was just a dream. Funny, he never woke up from that dream. That was when he knew everything was true and it was too late. He couldn’t do anything. Maybe there was no happy ending but at least she was happy before she died.

AFF HERE

Pumpkin hilang, bila nak balik? Kakak rindu angkin.

Love you guys, bubblebye ^_^